Monday, January 23, 2012
Why is it my 3 best guy friends have girlfriends(well more or less anyway) ???!!!! it sucks!
You're the ones that know how to make me smile when i feel like crap and one of you can relate to just about everything ive been through.... Im happy for you guys but what about me? What is it about me that makes me the best friend? Do i have a tattoo on my head or something?! I know in a way with all of you i have dodged a bullet and maybe thats why because God knows i deserve better but still..... i could spend so much time with all of you but you all have a girl in your life and i dont want to come across in the wrong way... just sometimes most of all your qualities i think thats what i want in a boyfriend but then its like you are jsut my best friends and thats weird but you.... especially you... im over you... but the way you know somethings wrong.... the way you always make me laugh and smile... the way you open up to me like no guy ever has before..... it means so much .... but in a way it means so much more that you are my best guy friend who i get to see heaps.....Its just that i can see how the lucky this girl is to have you in her life! the way you described to me how you kissed her... is it so wrong to want an awesome guy to do that to me one day?!
You're the ones that know how to make me smile when i feel like crap and one of you can relate to just about everything ive been through.... Im happy for you guys but what about me? What is it about me that makes me the best friend? Do i have a tattoo on my head or something?! I know in a way with all of you i have dodged a bullet and maybe thats why because God knows i deserve better but still..... i could spend so much time with all of you but you all have a girl in your life and i dont want to come across in the wrong way... just sometimes most of all your qualities i think thats what i want in a boyfriend but then its like you are jsut my best friends and thats weird but you.... especially you... im over you... but the way you know somethings wrong.... the way you always make me laugh and smile... the way you open up to me like no guy ever has before..... it means so much .... but in a way it means so much more that you are my best guy friend who i get to see heaps.....Its just that i can see how the lucky this girl is to have you in her life! the way you described to me how you kissed her... is it so wrong to want an awesome guy to do that to me one day?!
Friday, January 20, 2012
My Door
Now you're looking at this title going what the flipsy?! Don't worry I'm not going loopy!
Last night i redid the photos and certificates on my door. whilst many stayed, some were removed and some added.
There were a few photos on ther with people i used to classify as some of my best friends. We were 6 years ago..... but we have all grown apart and i have now realised how you work and think..... it is these things that i am now sick off and im tired of being nice to everyone and letting everything go. i will not go out of my way to be horrible to you, i will be nice where and if its needed but other than that you have lost my repsect by the way you treat me... It kinda sucked to look through photos and think how close we all used to be.....It's your own doing though. Ive been nothing but nice but that stops here. I deserve friends that will respect me and not treat me like crap and i am slowly putting friends through a sieve and finding the ones that matter most to me.
Last night i redid the photos and certificates on my door. whilst many stayed, some were removed and some added.
There were a few photos on ther with people i used to classify as some of my best friends. We were 6 years ago..... but we have all grown apart and i have now realised how you work and think..... it is these things that i am now sick off and im tired of being nice to everyone and letting everything go. i will not go out of my way to be horrible to you, i will be nice where and if its needed but other than that you have lost my repsect by the way you treat me... It kinda sucked to look through photos and think how close we all used to be.....It's your own doing though. Ive been nothing but nice but that stops here. I deserve friends that will respect me and not treat me like crap and i am slowly putting friends through a sieve and finding the ones that matter most to me.
Lat time you text something was wrong and you wanted to talk about it. This time I'm being used as a distraction. Meh I'll take what i can get cause you, my friend, make me happy and you make me laugh.
Sometimes i would just like my friendship valued....It's not just you, its others too... others that were far more important than most things in my life but now they are slowly losing my love.
Sometimes i would just like my friendship valued....It's not just you, its others too... others that were far more important than most things in my life but now they are slowly losing my love.
Prayer
It was Monday night where you said you were asking a girl out. it was Tuesday night she said maybe ans you didn't have much confidence. It is today that she has been round to yours two nights in a row on her own accord. It has been since Monday night that I have been praying for the both of you. Looks like its working. =D you're seeing her for the third night in a row tonight and I am so glad to see God working in your life. Only one thing would make it better... If you acknowledged that it was God. But hey, to see you starting a relationship with someone is a start. I'm so excited for you! =D . I am so glad you are one of my closest friends.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
WOW! You really like her... its sweet... makes a change for you... its really awesome to see.
The easy path: Get drunk and have sex with whoever......Not the pest path of life however the path you have travelled for a while...
The hard path: Have a deep and meaningful relationship not focused on sex........one you haven't really visited but the path you should take.....
This girl.....you want a relationship with her.... you two have been friends for a long time and now you've started seeing her in a different light......it was never going to be easy.....but life isn't easy. Its quite hard. I wanted to tell you tonight how much hurt i went through liking you.....
just so you get i know how you feel... i may not have asked you out directly but seeing you with someone else right before my eyes was enough.... But it's a part of life, you win some you lose some..... you love some you hate some.... Some just give you a maybe.....What if shes playing hard to get???? What if shes just toying with your heart??? I hope shes not, you've done many stupid things in your life but you don't deserve that....
you deserve someone who accepts you who are you are, knows that you have changed and wants to i guess help you be a better person. ..
You said yourself you don't remember just how bad you got at the social.....surely that means that you shouldn't drink so much..... i think i got that across to you tonight.. i hope i did..... You remembered some of the stuff though.... you remembered dancing with me which was cool cause that was hillarious! you remembered (insert name of young girl here) "latching on" to you .... this brings me to my next point...you said how you had her arm round her and then she "wrapped herself around you" and then the other young one came along..... when talking about this you were like UGH! however..... you encourage such behaviour... you let young girl #1 latch on to you.......the more you keep letting her the more she will do it. You will one day have to tell her enough is enough!
Anyway, back to you and this girl...... You said you were so nervous about seeing her today...thats cute.... however you said you physched yourself out that she would say no....its not an easy thinkg asking someone out... actually i wouldnt know ive never done it in person like that before but physching yourself out wouldnt've helped.......She said maybe... okay well there still lies hope.....she could be thinking about it and think well actually you would make a good bf.. IDK.... but i do know that you're not going through it without me....I am going to help you through this! And if she says no i will give you a hug and tell you someone way better is out there for you..... you just have to be patient but be kind and don't go wasting your life drinking and having sex.
I want you to live the hard path and get a sense of the real romantic world. you said your gonna close up, please don't. its so nice to be able to talk to you about everything. To be able to listen to everything. To know how you feel about everything! If you close up on me i will force it out of you! i will stand by your side until you are ready to talk. You said she knows your life story..... maybe shes better as a friend??? you need someone that knows everything about you to keep and treasure....you said i know half of it... im honored and i love finding out so much about you and having big heart to hearts like tonight. I just wish we hadn't been at training and could've talked for hours cause i could tell you had alot to say and some things are better off in person than over text or fb.......Ohwell i will have to just monitor you progress silently for a couple of days till thursday and i can interrogate you again!
Im done.... i think......... Lastly though, I care so much about you as a mate and i don't want to see you get hurt but i want to see you live the hard path.
The easy path: Get drunk and have sex with whoever......Not the pest path of life however the path you have travelled for a while...
The hard path: Have a deep and meaningful relationship not focused on sex........one you haven't really visited but the path you should take.....
This girl.....you want a relationship with her.... you two have been friends for a long time and now you've started seeing her in a different light......it was never going to be easy.....but life isn't easy. Its quite hard. I wanted to tell you tonight how much hurt i went through liking you.....
just so you get i know how you feel... i may not have asked you out directly but seeing you with someone else right before my eyes was enough.... But it's a part of life, you win some you lose some..... you love some you hate some.... Some just give you a maybe.....What if shes playing hard to get???? What if shes just toying with your heart??? I hope shes not, you've done many stupid things in your life but you don't deserve that....
you deserve someone who accepts you who are you are, knows that you have changed and wants to i guess help you be a better person. ..
You said yourself you don't remember just how bad you got at the social.....surely that means that you shouldn't drink so much..... i think i got that across to you tonight.. i hope i did..... You remembered some of the stuff though.... you remembered dancing with me which was cool cause that was hillarious! you remembered (insert name of young girl here) "latching on" to you .... this brings me to my next point...you said how you had her arm round her and then she "wrapped herself around you" and then the other young one came along..... when talking about this you were like UGH! however..... you encourage such behaviour... you let young girl #1 latch on to you.......the more you keep letting her the more she will do it. You will one day have to tell her enough is enough!
Anyway, back to you and this girl...... You said you were so nervous about seeing her today...thats cute.... however you said you physched yourself out that she would say no....its not an easy thinkg asking someone out... actually i wouldnt know ive never done it in person like that before but physching yourself out wouldnt've helped.......She said maybe... okay well there still lies hope.....she could be thinking about it and think well actually you would make a good bf.. IDK.... but i do know that you're not going through it without me....I am going to help you through this! And if she says no i will give you a hug and tell you someone way better is out there for you..... you just have to be patient but be kind and don't go wasting your life drinking and having sex.
I want you to live the hard path and get a sense of the real romantic world. you said your gonna close up, please don't. its so nice to be able to talk to you about everything. To be able to listen to everything. To know how you feel about everything! If you close up on me i will force it out of you! i will stand by your side until you are ready to talk. You said she knows your life story..... maybe shes better as a friend??? you need someone that knows everything about you to keep and treasure....you said i know half of it... im honored and i love finding out so much about you and having big heart to hearts like tonight. I just wish we hadn't been at training and could've talked for hours cause i could tell you had alot to say and some things are better off in person than over text or fb.......Ohwell i will have to just monitor you progress silently for a couple of days till thursday and i can interrogate you again!
Im done.... i think......... Lastly though, I care so much about you as a mate and i don't want to see you get hurt but i want to see you live the hard path.
Sunday, January 15, 2012
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